Q&A

Should You Reveal Your Flaws to Your New Date?

Question:

Is it considered honest to show a guy your flaws when you just started dating? Or will it just scare him away?


Sure, honesty is key to a lasting relationship. But being honest doesn't mean 'owning up' all your flaws to a new date. Honesty is being true to yourself: Don't make up things that aren't real, for example, lying that you're a fashion model when you're not one or pretending you're a gym fanatic when you hate working out.

Whether you like the idea or not, courtship is really not too different from a selling a product (in this case, you). In order to close the deal, you have to impress and make yourself as attractive, sexy and desirable as possible. So take it easy, let time slowly reveal your quirks and flaws (and you'll get to learn his idiosyncrasies too) when you move on to a steady romantic relationship.

Of course, it also depends what flaws you're talking about. If it's a bad habit you're referring to, for example smoking, then seek treatment so you can rid yourself of the addiction.

But if you're talking about physical flaws or something that can't be changed, then it's up to him to accept them. Everyone has shortcomings, and your new guy, wonderful as he is, isn't perfect himself. There's really no point trying to 'come clean' or be overly self-conscious about your flaws.

Instead, learn to come to grips with them and accept yourself for who you are, flaws and all. Allure, after all, isn't about perfection, but comes with self-confidence (and a charming sense of humour).

Good luck!






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